The Broken Woman; Crawling Back to your Exes by Blossom Obi
I keep recalling how he made me feel, the times we spent together, how he made me smile and why we split. Maybe I overreacted by saying I was done.
My pride won’t let me make the call but I didn’t have much pride left so I went crawling back.
Many times we are so emotionally attached to someone it feels like an addiction. We all have that one person we reach out to, sometimes the situation surrounding that person is not what we are really into, but we can’t help ourselves from bonding. Although we might claim sometimes that this person brings out the worst in us, or in other words we are an open bottle around that person, with our mighty flaws lying around and in display and we’re still loved and accepted.
To some of us, that’s like the important aspect of love. So that feeling of acceptance and strong comfortability creates a shield of dependence on the person. This is because around that person we share our best and worst behaviours, which is not an everyday comeback, as not very many persons can say they know us with all our flaws and limits and are still willing to stay and love us through it all.
Packing Out From Your Past
This was difficult to do. Moving on, he was my husband and we had three kids together. I had loved him part of me still does, although he was certain he was done with me he never knew why we were married in the first place or at least that was what he said. So this is me moving on
Although this might appear very difficult but it is needed because just like the pain and the hurt are alive inside of you, ‘’So Are You’’. You are alive and just like the saying goes when there’s life there’s hope, so pick up the pieces whatever is left of it, raise your head high and tell yourself you’re going to survive this, you’re going to be fine.
The Problem; we’re mentally stuck in the display of yesterday, holding on and longing for changes to happen, maybe we are in denial or resentment.
It is the past for a reason, it happened then and this is now. It is the past and should pass. The moving starts when you realize that all this pain is hindering you from the present, joy, peace, love, happiness and relaxation that resonates Inside you. Accept that it’s the past and there’s a whole world (life) ahead of you, doing the mental surgery with positive thoughts and lifestyles, avoiding toxic people and toxic conversations, because as much as we might not like to hear it. Toxic conversation s only drains us, how do you know the conversation is going toxic, when you start to yell or feel bad and your mind begins to close in on yourself with all the negative thoughts that isn’t you, and your peace of mind is being threatened, that’s toxic. The pain can’t hold you back unless you let it, only you have the power to do that. So free yourself, embrace the now, live in the moment, there’s so much Inside you waiting to burst open.
When Am I Ready For The Next?
This can happen when you feel that you’re okay on your own and don’t need a relationship. Also, that you feel you’re ready doesn’t mean that you are.
When it comes to your love life, your behaviour is the first place to start when asking yourself if you’re ready for a relationship. This is because your behaviour will reflect how balanced you are ;
1)outings/ parties/ church/clubs- there’s absolutely nothing wrong in going out to all these places but it is not a perequisite for places you find someone you hope to get involved with. Just after yhe introduction, pick a place where you can meet again a different environment.
2) why it didn’t work- yes we might be quick to point the blaming fingers ,forgetting that it takes two to mess up a relationship. When you’re really ready you can look back on past relationships and see which behaviours were unhealthy and counter proactive, ones that were mostly hinted on. When you think of your ex you might feel a bit angry but you don’t feel bitter.
3) You’ve Retired From The Drama- not just that you understand why your past relationship didn’t work but also you can safely say that you’re done with all the unhealthy lifestyle a bad relationship can bring, and you’re ready for some serious adult relationship. So when your friends talk about their exploits with different guys, you can breathe and say ‘’Not Anymore’’.
When Your Ex Picks Your Best Friend
Sometimes this is done out of spite and other times, he/she can relate with adequate understanding to your ex. Seeing as they have first-hand information on how things went down and shouldn’t have gone down. Probably they both weren’t meant for you in the first place.